“Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony.” – Thomas Merton
The Three A’s:
Awareness – Understanding and perceiving the situation. Taking time to give conscious attention to what’s going on.
Acceptance – Willingness to receive and embrace the situation. Admitting and coming to terms with occurrence, feelings and thoughts. Acknowledging reality is a difficult step. In mistakes, we have to recognize the situation as true and come to an agreement with the truth.
Action – A thoughtful response to the situation through change and transformation.
The order of the steps is important to cultivate emotional balance through mindfulness. Skipping leads to a different set of Three A’s – Awareness, Action, and Amends. The expectation that things will be different the next time around is a willful act of denial. A quick fix solution isn’t a solution. Let the truth wash over you. Healing plants seed of growth.
5 Tips for an Emotional Balance
1. Respond Instead of Reacting. Be proactive with feelings and thoughts – other people’s and yours. When you quickly act on emotions, you abandon reason. There’s integrity and respect in stepping back to assess the situation before responding. Example – An individual approaches you to greet you and mentions they haven’t seen you for a long time and wants to know what’s up with that. Translation – I’m hurt, I miss you. Instead of dismissing, reassure them by agreeing and that you’ve been busy. Apologize. Let them know you miss them too. Responding allows you to be in tune with your true selves.
2. Accept and Honor the Reality of Your Emotions. We live in a culture that embraces denial. We embrace the concept of perfectionism. This has the unintended consequences of distorting your truths . Denial interferes with our ability to make healing progress. If you feel sad, then that’s okay . If you feel angry, or confused, that’s okay too. Embrace those emotions and remember that they won’t last. This too shall pass. Just like rain – it happens and it’s not going to rain forever.
3. Look Inward and have True Compassion for Yourself. Take a honest look inside to open your heart – you will understand yourself, understand your feelings, you will understand your thoughts, where they come from, how it happened, and you can understand other people and where they come from. A connection through common humanity. Instead of resistance, put yourself in their shoes. That’s compassion.
4. Allow Action to Take Place. While awareness and acceptance paints a more accurate picture of your situation, the final piece of the puzzle is productivity. To experience a real transformation, you need to effect a change. Action uses the energy stagnation and makes you feel better.
5. Treat Gratitude as a Bonus; Make it a Requirement. The practice of gratitude is essential to our emotional wellness since it helps us refocus and shift to the good in our lives. This trains us to be positive and gives us appreciation for all that we have. Gratitude amplifies the savouring which brings authentic happiness.
Achieving an emotional balance is a lifelong process. A journey worth embarking. Positive emotions balance out negative emotions, and you find yourself more centered, connected, and intuitive.
If you want to further explore your emotional wellness, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org to schedule a complimentary 30 minute session. The consultation is deeply clarifying and enlightening, and by the end of our conversation you will know if Deaf Roots & Wings is an approach that fits with your values and intentions. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.